Hobbes was roughly six weeks old when he entered my life in 1994. I was in college and dating a guy who lived right next door to me. The guy worked at a restaurant and one night after work stumbled across a tiny, malnourished little ball of fur. No one really knows how he got separated from his mother or litter mates, but they couldn't be found and so the guy brought him home. I gave him his name. I was a huge fan of the Calvin and Hobbes comic strip and it was the only name that I wanted him to have. The relationship with the guy didn't last a lot longer and when the guy had to move to a place that wouldn't allow pets, I got custody of Hobbes. He's been with me ever since. Last night I had to put him to sleep. And I am heartbroken.
It has been an exceedingly bad two years for me. I don't really know that there are actually words to describe how difficult things have been or how endless some of these days have seemed, but what I can say is that my two cats made each day more bearable throughout this time. Hobbes was especially a comfort. He had a sweet, simple, loving spirit and most people who met him, loved him. He was so funny and clownish sometimes, too. I have hundreds of funny stories about him. He was with me through college, through my marriage and divorce and moved countless times with me over the years. He's in most of my memories for nearly two decades.
The last two years weren't easy for him either. His health had begun to decline and he mourned the loss of my marriage as much as I did because he really loved my ex. People don't think that animals grieve, but they do. Hobbes most definitely grieved. I hated watching how sad he became. For weeks, he looked for my ex. He stopped playing and ending up staying on my bed, day in and day out, doing little else but sleep. And he ending up sleeping next to me every single night after my ex left. Last night was a long, lonely night.
The thing about pets is they tend to be the best of us. They are unconditional love personified. They give us the one thing that some of us spend our entire lives looking for in other human beings. Their love is easily given and the only thing they expect in return is that same kind of love. There is no judgment from them, no major demands. They only want us. We are their entire world.
I'm having him cremated. I don't know what I'll do with his ashes. But I couldn't bear to just put him to sleep and walk away. I didn't want him to just be thrown away. He was a wonderful cat and was so very loved and was the best pet I've ever had.
Hobbes, 1994-2013
